Film Friday #283

How to be Single (2016)

Alice (Dakota Johnson) has been dating Josh (Nicholas Braun) for four years but now she wants to take a break and try out the single life in New York. She has no idea how to behave as a singleton so she teams up with her crazy colleague, Robin (Rebel Wilson), who is very good at being single, drinking, drugging and basically just doing whatever she likes. At the same time Alice’s sister, Meg (Leslie Mann), an oby-gyn who has never wanted children starts to think she might and Alice’s neighbour, Lucy (Alison Brie) struggles to take a chance on anybody.

As these ladies try figure out what they want and who they want it from both laughs and drama abound… sort of. How to Be Single isn’t awful. It’s pretty watchable in a predictable kind of way, if you enjoy watching Rebel Wilson playing Rebel Wilson (if not avoid like the plague) and if you’re in the throes of your table-dancing twenties or can still sort of remember them through the tequila fog. You won’t learn anything new or remember anything that happened in this a week later but you probably won’t be bored either and you might even manage a giggle or two. 2.5/5

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Ah breakfast wine, my old friend!

Love & Friendship (2016)

Lady Susan Vernon (Kate Beckinsale) is notorious for getting what she wants, no matter how she has to do it. When the rumours of what she’s been up too become and bit too much and she becomes a bit too broke she decides to visit her in-laws in the hope of finding herself a husband… and one for her daughter, Frederica (Morfydd Clark), who doesn’t really want one. At Lady Vernon’s schemes get ever more elaborate, she convenes with her American friend, Alicia Johnson (Chloë Sevigny) to plan her next steps but will she get her way this time or will the chickens finally come home to roost. Love & Friendship is based on a lesser-known Jane Austen novel called Lady Susan and features her usual tongue-in-cheek humour and a lot of “things not being what they appear”. Ultimately however it’s little more than fluff. Enjoyable enough in the moment but without the gravitas of something like Pride & Prejudice. If you enjoy a bit of period drama and a bit of a romcom this will prove a satisfying combination of the two, just don’t expect to be wowed. 2.5/5

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No your hair looks like a giant basket!

Left Behind (2014)

Oh dear god… where do I begin. In the worst decision ever, Nicolas Cage plays Rayford Steele (yes… Rayford), a pilot avoiding his bible thumping wife (Lea Thompson) who has been rabbiting on about the ascension happening any minute. For those who were not dragged to Sunday school, the ascension is a supposed future Biblical occurence where god collects up the righteous straight into heaven and leaves everyone else to sort their shit out pre-Judgement Day. On the weekend that Ray’s daughter Chloe (Cassi Thomson) is coming to visit he decides he’s rather going to bugger off on a flight to London so he can shag an air hostess (wearing a uniform more suited to a porn movie than an airline). Chloe is pretty pissed off and confronts him before going to visit her mother and listen to her spout off some more Jesus-ness. But then people start disappearing and all hell breaks loose, including on Rayford’s flight. Then I fell asleep a bit and it appears nothing happened because they were still on the plane but the lack of co-pilot and air traffic controllers isn’t helping anyone… anyway, blah, blah… Mrs Rayford was right all along… and there’s a message as subtle as a sledgehammer being driven home at ramming speed. Mr O and I decided to watch this because we thought it might be so bad it was good but actually it was so bad it might be the worst movie I have ever seen. Avoid. Avoid. Avoid. 0/5

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Nic was confused. How did he get here? Who was that bloke taking a shit behind him? Why was everything on fucking fire?

Murder by Numbers (2002)

Richard Haywood (Ryan Gosling) is handsome and popular, while Justin Pendleton (William Pitt) is a geeky outcast but what the two teenagers have in common is their interest in the act of murder and the desire to kill someone and get away with it. When a young woman’s body is found it falls on Detective Cassie Mayweather (Sandra Bullock) and her rookie partner, Sam Kennedy (Ben Chaplin) to investigate. Although there is a clear suspect and it seems to be an open and shut case, Cassie suspects Richard and Justin, so much so that she’s willing to put her career on the line. But just why is Cassie so adamant and what secret is she hiding from her past. Poor Sandra Bullock, this clunking police procedural with it’s stinky script can’t even be saved by her charm. She does her best but this is nothing more than an average episode of Criminal Minds. I think the only reason anyone remembers this is because Sandy and the Gos briefly dated as a result of it and there’s a 16 year age difference (which, of course, if it had been an older man and a younger woman no one would have noticed). Meh. 2/5

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Hey girl… I’m not trying to pick you up. I know you can afford to buy your own mid-range, fuel efficient vehicle

8 Comments

  1. Sorry to hear you didn’t like Love and Friendship that much. I actually enjoyed it, but if we all agreed, movie reviewing would be boring.

    1. It seems I’m in the minority really. I just found it a bit “fluffy”.

      1. Sometimes it is good to be in the minority. Would be boring if we always agreed.

  2. only have seen murder and it definitely was meh. Have no real desire to see any of the others. Nice to see u back in the swing of things abs! Keep up the great work!

  3. I might give Rebel Wilson a look. I like to see larger ladies getting a chance to star.
    I am actually anticipating Love and Friendship with relish.
    Confession! I bought Murder by Numbers on DVD, and it played like a TV film, despite the cast. Mind you, it was only £2.99, so no big deal.
    Best wishes, Pete.

    1. You can’t complain too much for £2.99 can you?

  4. Doesn’t sound like any of them are worth watching!

    1. I think a lot of people liked Love & Friendship more than I did so don’t write it off on my account.

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