Film Friday #230

Mad Max: Fury Road (2015)

In a desolate, post-apocalyptic world road warrior Max (Tom Hardy) is captured by the minions of water-hoarding dictator, Immortan Joe (Hugh Keays-Byrne) and assigned to provide clean blood to one of his half-life war boys, Nux (Nicholas Hoult). At the same time one of Joe’s top leaders, Imperator Furiosa (Charlize Theron) is heading out on a war rig to run a supply mission… or is she? When Joe discovers that Furiosa has his five wives  (Zoë Kravitz,, Rosie Huntington-Whiteley, Riley Keough, Abbey Lee, Courtney Eaton)  – read sex slaves – in tow and she’s not coming back he sends his war boys, including Nux, after her. Nux brings Max along to keep him juiced and soon both are caught up in an epic car chase across the desert. Oh what a lovely day! So I’ll be straight up here, I loved most of Fury Road. I loved the way it looked like some kind of German dungeon porn. 80’s hair metal video fever dream. I loved that director George Miller decided to go absolutely balls to the wall mental with it . Truck rigged up with a masked electric guitarist playing war anthems? Check! Noseless, nipple-rubbing, middle-aged clan leader? Check. I loved that the world-building was so vivid and creative and intricate. I loved that Furiosa was an absolutely fucking badass, so much so that Charlize Theron actually didn’t annoy me even a little bit. I loved that although the wives were half nekkid they actually had personalities. I loved that Max had obviously snapped but was still able to connect with some of his humanity. And I especially loved that there was no attempt to manhandle some kind of love story between Max and Furiosa into the story, which would have compromised both of their characters. Hardy, Theron and Hoult were all great – maybe Hardy is best playing characters who don’t say too much, especially in a Russian accent and how does Hoult still manage to be adorable painted white, with no hair and boils? I didn’t love everything though. While over-exposition can kill an action film I would have liked to know why the war boys were all ill and I wanted to know more about Joe than just that he was really gross and didn’t want to share his water. Nevermind all of that though. See this film and see it on the biggest screen possible in 3D. 4/5


Silence of the Lambs hood ornaments – now at a car dealership near you!

The Lunchbox (2013)

So apparently Mumbai has this amazing lunchbox delivery service where you can make someone lunch which is then collected by delivery guys who drop it off at exactly the right person. The delivery guys then collect the empty lunchboxes and return them to the owner. Some lunchboxes are made for one family member for another but they also come from restaurants for those who are not fortunate enough to have someone at home to make their lunch. Ila (Nimrat Kaur) makes lunch for her husband, Ranjeev daily and hands it over to be delivered. Ranjeev is generally disinterested in anything Ila does so she strives to make his lunch more exciting everyday. One day the lunchbox comes back completely empty but when Ila questions Ranjeev about it he seems to remember having something different for lunch. It is then that she realises that the lunchbox delivery men have done something unheard of and delivered her lunchbox to the wrong person. That person is Saajan Fernandes (Irrfan Khan) a cantankerous and lonely widower on the eve of retirement. The two start corresponding through letters placed in the lunchboxes, confiding in each other and finding a lifeline to the outside world. As Ila’s attention starts to make Saajan open up he also befriends Shaikh (Nawazuddin Siddiqui), the young man training to be his replacement. On the face of it The Lunchbox seems to be very simple but when you look a little bit deeper it’s really about what it means to feel alone whether by choice, habit or even while surrounded by others and how our connections with others make us human. On the other side of the coin it explores what happens to those who aren’t able to find a connection with the outside world and the heartbreaking consequences of loneliness. I found this to be a quirky, touching story with excellent performances from Kaur, Khan and Siddiqui. 3.5/5

I know that smell... it's teen spirit, isn't it?

I know that smell… it’s teen spirit, isn’t it?

Girl Model (2011)

Ashley Arbaugh is a modelling scout who finds Eastern European girls for the Japanese fashion market. The Japanese market is very specific in what it likes going for girls who look young, “cute”, fresh faced and very thin, showing very little adult development. This means that Ashley, working with an Eastern European liaison called Tigran Khachatrian mostly casts girls who are barely teenagers. Desperate for a life with more opportunities than they have now the girls show up in droves and are summarily accepted or rejected by Ashley. One of these girls is Nadya who is chosen to spend a month attending castings in Tokyo. When Nadya leaves she is full of excitement expecting to take Japan by storm but its not long before she realises that she is almost completely alone, left with no money for food, sharing a cramped apartment with a stranger and almost incapable of communicating with anyone except her roommate. On the other hand Ashley is racked with guilt because as a former model herself she knows that once she has chosen the girls their fate is unlikely to be a positive one. And then there’s Tigran who seems to be convincing himself that he is saving these girls despite the fact that the agency only makes money when exploiting them. This whole documentary is very creepy. Ashley clearly has mental health issues and urgently needs help. Normal people do not keep baby dolls in their houses in lieu of having actual children, nor do they take weird, sneaky photos of people’s feet. And Tigran is not the messiah, he’s more like a pimp. As grim as it all is I kind of felt like the directors didn’t push hard enough. There are mentions of girls who fail as models and becoming prostitutes but this is never explored further nor is Ashley brought to book for her role in misleading the potential models. Very average. 2.5/5


The casting’s for the IPC’s Basement Wench project were going well

Vampire Academy (2014)

You know when even before you start watching a film you know it’s going to be shit and then you start watching it and within five minutes you’ve confirmed that it is indeed shit but for some unknown reason you don’t turn it off and keep watching it anyway even though it’s not Shitfest? So that’s what happened here. Anyway Rose (Zoey Deutch) is something called a Dhampir who are these warriors who look after the Moroi, who are vampires but not bitey… or sparkly. The Dhampirs have to look after the Moroi because these other vampires who are very bitey (but also not sparkly) called Strigoi want to end them. I don’t know why. They probably said but this film failed to hold any of my attention so basically I have no idea. Rose’s charge is Lissa Dragomir (Lucy Fry), who is her best friend and also a Moroi princess. For other reasons I couldn’t figure out the two of them had run off and then been dragged back to their vampire high school where everyone hates them… also not sure why. And someone is after them and making Lissa do weird shit and I don’t fucking know. I wasn’t paying any attention. Bad acting, terrible script, lame story line (probably). AVOID. 0/5

The  latest Crow movie was proving to be a massive letdown

The latest Crow movie was proving to be a massive letdown


  1. Great post, glad you’re feeling the Fury Road love.

    1. abbiosbiston

      Thanks! It was such a wild, fun ride how could I not!

      1. You rock sister, Fury Road is one hell of a ride.

  2. Abbi, I’d like to see The Lunch Box; I’ve heard it’s good and you confirmed that. Everyone loves Fury Road.

    1. abbiosbiston

      It takes a while to get going but once it does it’s a very sweet, touching film.

  3. I am so amped to see Fury Road! The Luncbox… I had never heard of it but it actually sounds like it has the potential to be quite fascinating and interesting. I might have to track it down some time!

    That documentary sounds icky and like it had so much more potential. However, I have never heard one good thing about VA, so I will skip it. Though I do love the way you address it xD

    1. abbiosbiston

      You are going to LOVE Fury Road. It is so epic.

      I really think Girl Model could have been fascinating but I’m not sure they realised how insane the model scout was before they started filming.

  4. theipc

    Those trophies don’t make themselves, you know! I need The Essence!

    1. abbiosbiston

      You sound like the guy from Perfume.

  5. MAD MAX! FUCK YES! 5/5, though. 😉 I actually really like the idea behind The Lunchbox. It sounds kind of like Internet relationships but without the Internet! I’ll never watch the other two. Especially that vampire one. Because it’s shit and I know it’s shit. Why did you do that to yourself when it wasn’t even for The IPC?! Lol 🙂

    1. abbiosbiston

      Definitely do NOT watch the Vampire one. It is a big old ball of kakky!

      I think you would enjoy The Lunchbox. It takes its time but it is very similar to an internet relationship with the way their affection grows without meeting.

  6. Great post. Vampire Academy looks horrid. I liked Mad Max, had fun, but didn’t love it nearly as much as everyone else. I saw Lunchbox a few months ago and wasn’t too impressed. It’s pleasant but uneventful and forgettable.

    1. abbiosbiston

      Stay away from Vampire Academy. It is everything that is bad! I can see how The Lunchbox wouldn’t be for everyone but I thought it was more than the some of its parts with good performances.

  7. Great stuff, Abbi. I LOVED Mad Max! Glad you liked it too. I wasn’t tempted by The Lunchbox and VA sounds hilariously bad. I watched a BBC3 documentary recently about young models in Russia and it was sooooo depressing. Poor girls.

    1. abbiosbiston

      I think a BBC3 documentary would probably be much better than what I watched.

  8. Mad Max was intense and I can’t wait to experience that again. Haven’t seen any of the other movies you mention…

    1. abbiosbiston

      I think it;s definitely worth catching it again on the big screen if you can. I’m not sure that its intensity is going to translate to smaller screens as well.

  9. MIB

    Good post as ever. 🙂

    I guess I am the only person who is not rushing to see Mad Max. I’ll probably rent the Blu-ray to see what the fuss is about though. :/

    BTW – pointless trivia time: Riley Keogh is Elvis’s granddaughter! 😛

    1. abbiosbiston

      Thank you! I think you might miss out on some of the epic-ness of Fury Road if you don’t catch it on the big screen but I can see why it might not be your thing.

      I actually did know that about Riley Keogh oddly enough.

  10. I finally read this since we saw Mad Max. Twice. OMFG I love this movie!!! Hence the twice. And yes, it was even more amazing in 3D. I want to see it again. And again.

    1. abbiosbiston

      I’m so glad you enjoyed it. I am hoping yo catch it again too!

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