Film Friday #154

We Are the Night

Lena (Karoline Herfurth), a disaffected Berlin pickpocket, catches the eye of Louise (Nina Hoss), the lesbian leader of a trio of vampires. Louise is looking for the love of her life and thinks Lena might be the one so she turns her. Initially Lena is confused by what is happening to her, but after making her first kill she starts to enjoy the trappings of her new life. At the same time the police, lead by Lena’s pre-vamp love interest (Max Riemelt) are investigating a group of criminals that Lena’s gang have attacked and they’re getting ever closer to uncovering their secret. Despite being a vampire movie, this German thriller is surprisingly bloodless focusing more on the emotions its characters are going through, heightened by their immortality. Herfurth does a good job of portraying Lena’s internal conflict and overall it’s not a bad watch but feels a bit like its missing something. 2.5/5

XXX

Poke!

Fighting

In New York, street hustler, Shawn MacArthur (Channing Tatum) crosses paths with Harvey Boarden (Terrence Howard) during a brawl. Harvey happens to manage underground bare knuckle boxing matches and convinces Shawn to participate in a fight, thrusting him into a shady new world filled with opportunity but also danger. I quite like a fight movie. They’re a bit like dance movies (which our Channing is also a veteran of), which are my guilty pleasure. I’m quite willing to forgive rather a lot of cliches but Fighting takes it to a whole new level. Add in a flat script, minimal character development and an extraordinary number of coincidences dragging the storyline along and you’ve got a great big steaming turd.  Both Howard and Tatum are capable of turning in a decent performance, which makes this even more disappointing. 1/5

Oh yeah! There's nothing quite like being topless on the subway.

Oh yeah! There’s nothing quite like being topless on the subway.

Bachelorette

When Regan (Kirsten Dunst) finds out that her fat high school best friend, Becky (Rebel Wilson) is getting married to a handsome rich man, she is shocked but agrees to plan the wedding. On the night before she reunites with the rest of their school friends, Gena (Lizzy Caplan) and Katie (Isla Fisher) to throw a bachelorette party, which soon turns sour driving Becky to bed. But Regan, Gena and Katie aren’t ready to go to bed so they go on a cocaine fueled bender, ruining Becky’s dress in the process. Now they have only hours to remedy the situation and possibly their own disastrous love lives. With such a great cast this could have been brilliant but Regan, Gena and Katie are such horrible, unlikeable bitches that they’re almost impossible to identify with. There are also some very mixed messages being sent out about sexual violence, drug use and bullying that made me feel really uncomfortable. Just… awful. 0/5

Gena didn't get the shoe memo. Now she is shunned.

Gena didn’t get the beige shoe memo. Now she is shunned.

The Last Airbender

Brother and sister, Katara (Nicola Pearce) and Sokka (Jackson Rathbone) find a boy named Aang (Noah Ringer) buried under the ice, they realise he might be the Avatar, who disappeared one hundred years ago, unbalancing the world and plunging it into war at the hands of the Fire Nation. In order to bring the world back to balance, Aang will have to travel with Katara and Sokka to the northern water world (or something) to finish his training. It won’t be an easy journey though because Zuko (Dev Patel) of the Fire Nation is on their tail trying to capture Aang to appease his father Lord Orzai (Cliff Curtis). Parts of this film look pretty impressive but the storyline is a garbled mess, most of the acting is disastrous and the script is utterly flat. I get the impression there were supposed to be sequels which didn’t happen because the first installment was such an unmitigated disaster. Good work as usual, M. Night Shayamalan. Point purely for special effects. 1/5

I knew I shouldn't have swallowed that glowstick

I knew I shouldn’t have swallowed that glowstick

17 Comments

  1. theipc

    Bachelorette was a TERRIBLE movie….

    1. Abbi

      I agree. Horrendous!

      1. theipc

        I couldn’t even believe it with all of that talent… THBTHBTHBTHBTHBTHB

        1. Abbi

          What a waste. I am surprised that none of them got halfway through the script and just went, um, no…

    2. Um. Eric watched Bachelorette??

      1. Abbi

        Apparently so 😉

      2. theipc

        I told you I watch a LOT of movies – I just don’t go write about them on my mostly horror movie site 🙂

  2. Oh no, I’m alone with Bachelorette! I watched is last weekend and I really liked it, but then I love Rebel Wilson, Isla Fisher and Lizzy Caplan so I think I may have been blinded by that…

    1. Abbi

      It really was an awesome cast. I just felt like the way the characters behaved made it very hard to identify with them.

      1. I can see what you mean. It’s such a shame that you felt that the film was a let-down 😦

  3. Oh dear – looks like a terrible week of movies for you! Not seen any and won’t bother. That Bachelorette sounds awful! Exactly the kind of movie that pisses me off. Why do so many movies think we all want to watch evil bitchy characters? I try to avoid horrible people in real life – I don’t want to be “entertained” by them for two hours!

    1. Abbi

      That is exactly how I felt about it. It was not a good movie week but to some extent I can only blame myself for my choices!

  4. The still you chose for We are the Night is wonderfully subversive. I am intrigued by this one.

    1. Abbi

      It’s quite an interesting watch because it looks at the emotional implications of eternal life. There are some pretty wild party scenes though.

  5. Wow. I’m sorry you had to sit through these (except the first on the list).

    1. Abbi

      I did it to myself really. Fortunately this week is looking a lot better!

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